Distant Mountain

For a short while, we are in ordinary time, so each day the words of the morning office roll around in my head like familiar friends not seen for a while. Then while the term ordinary also feels like the complete opposite, we have the gospel of John telling us about Mary Magdalene seeing the risen Jesus for the first time, I mean, how is that ordinary? It's such wonderful, (if confusing, for her) news! There is also Lent around the corner, with all the anticipation that brings. But while the office is familiar, praying intercessions each day is always whatever feels right. Whatever comes to mind is prayed for, often a mental list of people and events I bring before God every day but today, there was silence. Nothing came to mind at all. I sat in the stillness and became aware of birdsong in the garden, the blinds were closed but a glimmer of first light was nudging it's way into the day. I let the silence fill with birdsong, a few thoughts crossed my mind but I stayed si...

Oh Lord my God There are times when my heart is cold and I cannot feel thee near, days when all that keeps me going is a sense of duty. Keep me steady and faithful at these times and remind me of thy presence in the past, until suddenly thou dost make myself known to thee again, and I know how the grass feels when the dew falls, and the bird at the day’s first ray of light. Then I realise that I have walked by faith, safely, because thou has been with me all the time. Ever Present by George Appleby With thanks to Rona

Advent Calendar He will come like last leaf's fall. One night when the November wind has flayed the trees to the bone, and earth wakes choking on the mould, the soft shroud's folding. He will come like frost. One morning when the shrinking earth opens on mist, to find itself arrested in the net of alien, sword-set beauty. He will come like dark. One evening when the bursting red December sun draws up the sheet and penny-masks its eye to yield the star-snowed fields of sky. He will come, will come, will come like crying in the night, like blood, like breaking, as the earth writhes to toss him free. He will come like child. © Rowan Williams

As we rejoice in the gift of this new day, so may the light of your presence, O God, set our hearts on fire with love for you; now and for ever. Amen. 23 Yet I am always with you;  • you hold me by my right hand. 24 You will guide me with your counsel  • and afterwards receive me with glory. 25 Whom have I in heaven but you?  • And there is nothing upon earth that I desire in comparison with you. 26 Though my flesh and my heart fail me,  • God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever. (Psalm 73) I haven't blogged in some time, a combination of reasons, largely because I've been busy, confused and just unsure what to say. I've got several unfinished posts sitting there but not sure if I want to finish them just at the moment. Amid all the business, and quite a lot of frustration, I prayed this morning and all of that lifted. All the confusion, anger, pain, challenges and opportunities, were handed to God in prayer. There is...

A great thoughtful post here on the sharing of secrets and the timing of our God given destinies. I left this comment which stands alone I think.... Much to think about here, thank you. The thought which resonated with me was, "And the reason that God sometimes reveals the dreams and destiny he has for us in advance is that dreams can be deferred—can take decades to be fulfilled." I think it's worth remembering this, I sometimes think that my destiny has been revealed, but not the timing. Knowing the dream is there though, brings hope for a future not yet seen. The danger, like you say, is talking to too many people about the dream as often they aren't ready to hear it (for all sorts of reasons), which is all part of working out the timing. All these things can only be in God's time.

In a discussion last year at a house group we started talking about when we had given ourselves to Christ. Many could cite specific times in their lives when they had committed to following Jesus. I kept quiet as the discussion moved on but I knew I had side-stepped a public answer, but not perhaps for the reasons you may be guessing... In my heart, I knew I had given myself to God, to follow Christ, but I couldn't give a time or place when I knew this had happened, hence my silence. No sudden born again, bright lights moment, just the sure, safe knowledge that I am his. Those who know me may think it slightly odd that I couldn't give a " when" , especially as for a long time, I hadn't been to church at all until six years ago so you could say well surely in the last six years, wasn't there a moment or an event which made it all clear. I don't think there was though, it was a gradual realisation, a slow re-birth as I realised I has always been his ...

On the advice of another blogger I took the chance to listen to Sunday Worship on Radio 4 from Ripon College, Cuddeson. The iplayer recording has now expired, but a transcript is available  here . There was some wonderful music and I always find it helpful to hear how other people have found vocation and how every story is different. The talk by the principal is worth referring back to again and again; " But if it is true that every Christian has a vocation, what are the next steps? How would you know you were called? How could you be sure? You can’t of course, but there are a few simple things to bear in mind - things we often remind students of here at Cuddesdon. First, have courage. Many vocations never take root because of fear. Fear of failure, or of perhaps just of getting it wrong – suppose someone rumbles that I am just ordinary? Suppose I really make a mess of it? But mistakes happen, and I think the best thing we can try to do is learn from these ...